'32

I wish my Grandfather read
Fante,
maybe he did,
but a suspicion as large as
a beached whale tells
me he didn't.

What a man he was!
five children and a miscarriage-
a salesman with a heart
of a solider and as heavy
as gold bars,

but worth so much more.

I wish he knew,
I wish they all knew
of the honor of the 30's
of the temptation,
of the sacrifice.

of the screaming
money worries of home.

what a man he was!
such a man with 2 brothers
better off,
wealthy,
sort of respected but not
the way he was.

he asked for nothing and took
what he was given and
paid dearly for it.

never asked for more then what
someone else thought he was worth,
finished grade 7,
hair white as angels, as snow,
by 18.

I wish he could of read Fante! He would of understood!
I wish i could pass him the book and together
over coffee we would have one of our
slow decoded conversations!


but,
He made his choices and lived
proudly by them.

A man who alone could have done so much more,
so much better for himself!
traveled the world,
he could speak so easily to anyone
but,
like a beached whale,
he stood by his decisions
and slowly died by them,
one eye staring at the sea behind him.
telling himself to believe
it was all worth giving up.